Really struggling. 9 yr old and sleep.

**Honey Dew** · 10-07-2012, 03:23pm

10 to midnight. He's asleep!
Time to hit the hay and hope for a bit of kip before Edie and Reuben wake up!

**Rosa** · 10-07-2012, 03:41pm

I agree about later bedtime, my DS has always gone to sleep late, 9.30pm for the last couple of years, have just come to accept it. I wake him at 8am on school days so he still gets 10hrs+ sleep which is loads. I used to put him to bed at 7pm and he would take so long to get to sleep, he would still be awake when we went to bed

. Then we changed it to 8pm and allow him time in his bed to play with toys or stickers or look at books then we come up and put the lights out and an audio book when its sleep time.

**PoppyHoney** · 10-07-2012, 03:43pm

Originally Posted by Damsella

Just to say, if I put DD (who is eight) to bed at 7.30pm it would take her HOURS to get to sleep! Sometimes more time in bed means it's harder to get to sleep, not easier. She generally goes to bed at about 8.30-pm/9pm, which to me seems really late but it suits her.
?

Evie's the same (aged 7). I struggled for a long time to get her to sleep at what I thought was a reasonable time, but it seems like she genuinely doesn't need to go to sleep till 8:30-9.

Some aromatherapy might help him, or it could just be that his sleeping patterns are changing an he's struggling to adapt. Could he try anything like meditation?

**Jelly** · 10-07-2012, 04:27pm

7.30pm is pretty early for a boy that age. DS1 is nearly 10, and he goes to bed at 8.30pm, as do most of his friends. Sometimes he goes up and reads for half an hour, but it's lights out by half past 8. I don't let him use the computer during the week, and I limit telly as well, which I think helps him settle naturally.7.30pm is pretty early for a boy that age. DS1 is nearly 10, and he goes to bed at 8.30pm, as do most of his friends. Sometimes he goes up and reads for half an hour, but it's lights out by half past 8. I don't let him use the computer during the week, and I limit telly as well, which I think helps him settle naturally.

ETA: he does get grouchy some evenings, and I tried sending him to bed early on these nights, but he ended up staying awake even later.

**donna-j** · 10-07-2012, 07:19pm

Mine are 4 and 6 and lights out is 8.30. Clara is often asleep by 8.15 but Thomas has never needed to be asleep earlier than 8, even when he was a baby.

**Daisy66** · 10-07-2012, 10:00pm

I would have thought 7.30 a bit early at that age too. Perhaps the stress of trying to sleep when he's not ready for it is keeping him awake, iyswim?

My dd is 8.5 and goes up at about 8 but she always reads until 9, occasionally later if I forget to tell her to stop

**Chell** · 10-07-2012, 10:23pm

DS has just turned nine. He has always gone to her with his sisters at 7.30. The girls to straight to sleep but he reads. He was reading until 8 but was still awake at gone 9pm. He has a digital clock so knows when he must stop reading.

I have started to let him stay up until 8pm then read. He can read until 9pm at the very latest but if he feels tired then he must stop reading sooner. I think that is was probably making him frustrated being in bed early and not being ready to sleep. We only started the later routine recently but I'm hoping the later bedtime actually gets him to sleep earlier.

**thirzasmum** · 10-07-2012, 10:24pm

DH and I have settled our insomnia pretty much by listening to audiobooks with a 15 or 30min sleep timer. DH always listens to the same thing so he doesn't "listen to the story" . Me I'm still trying to listen to proper books in a sequential manner but I have to keep back tracking LOL

I did, for a while use a relaxation app on the ipod. But after a while I found it irritating! I think listening for the next "thing to do" stopped me dropping off.

Don't sent him early. Send him say 8.30 for a bit and get him good and tired. Then a really benign audio book read by someone calming.Actually if he just lies cosy and happy in bed and listens for ages I think you'll have broken the cycle of getting worked up about being awake and you'll be on to a winner.

**Honey Dew** · 11-07-2012, 02:09am

Thanks everyone for your replies. I will maybe try a bit later for him, maybe not tonight as he's knackered from last nights shenanigans!
I'll tell him he can listen to his audio book in bed to help calm him.
Also got our naturopath friend on the case. He's away out today on his day off, but will test up some things for him when he gets home which will be kind of tea time.

Huge thanks!

**suemarie** · 11-07-2012, 09:46am

When I was 9 me & my sister went to bed @ 20:30 we didn't fall asleep until about 21:00pm as it took us a while to wind down.

At that age I didn't need 11 hours & I was reluctant to go to bed any earlier...I still had to be woken by mum every morning and this carried on until I started college (she was a teacher for the local GCSE college so took me & my sister to school) by then I bought my own alarm clock.

7-12 Years Old:

10 - 11 hours per dayAt these ages, with social, school, and family activities, bedtimes gradually become later and later, with most 12-years-olds going to bed at about 9 p.m. There is still a wide range of bedtimes, from 7:30 to 10 p.m., as well as total sleep times, from 9 to 12 hours, although the average is only about 9 hours.