Am I being unreasonable?

**Damsella** · 03-05-2012, 11:15am

I think two weeks is quite a long time to be without one's family.

How about going for one week? That would be equal to the week your OH was away working, as that seems to be an important point for you.

**bluekat** · 03-05-2012, 11:19am

Another thing. It isn't as if you are off to sunny-Spain, lapping it up in a 5* hotel and he's missing out on that. You're going to see your mum, the kids' nan. This is a bit different.

Okay, he'll miss them (and you), but surely he can suck it up for the kids' benefit?

I hope the pair of you can reach an agreement.

**Peridot** · 03-05-2012, 01:45pm

My dh would love if I took the boys off for a fortnight and gave him some peace and quiet

youre the one that has to deal with keeping them entertained in the summer holidays, I don't think it's very fair on your children that they miss out because he doesn't think it's fair on him. Can he come with you at all?

Tbh the start of your post is all about this but then you completely change to the fact you don't even want to be with him, I think perhaps you need to have a longer conversation with him, maybe the break would be good for both of you?

**Fiz** · 03-05-2012, 01:47pm

I wouldn't be happy if my DH took off for two weeks with my daughter and didn't even invite me. You would need permission to take them out of the country if you were divorced, so that really wouldn't be easier.

If you are harbouring a grudge about being left for a week when he was working, then I'd tackle that separately. It does sound as if you are using this to get back at him - it's difficult when things get into a tit-for-tat stage, hope you can avoid this

**bubblewrap** · 03-05-2012, 02:00pm

Does he know how you are feeling about him and your relationship? Could he be scared that you'll not return, or that it'll only put more space between you that can't be fixed?

**Dynamo** · 03-05-2012, 02:09pm

We do this every year - last year it was 4 weeks. We go stay with my mum. In an ideal world, he would be able to come with us, but as things stand, he can't. We all accept that we would change it if we could, but DH would never stop the kids spending time with their grandmother (in our case it is their only opportunity to see her).

**Dr Spouse** · 03-05-2012, 02:26pm

We always did this when I was young, to California (you may throw up now). But my dad always came out for a short time.

**nattylou** · 03-05-2012, 02:42pm

Thanks for your insight ladies. maybe I should get dh to read your replies.

I'm thinking of offering 1 week going on the train instead of 2 on a plane.