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    1. #11
      Damsel Diva Bert2e
      Location
      South East
      Posts
      3,829

      Re: :-( G has lost an ounce. Not sure if I can carry on.

      Have you looked at the section on Kellymom about increasing weight gain?

      http://kellymom.com/health/growth/weight-gain_increase/



    2. #12

      Re: :-( G has lost an ounce. Not sure if I can carry on.

      Ok, one thing I realised with both of my babies is to sustain their milk I had to eat ALOT of food! Now I'm not telling you to stuff your face with rubbish just make sure you eat and drink plenty. After each feed try and express of each boob, at first you probably won't get any but you are sending signals to your body to make more milk.

      Put her to the breast as much as possible. Also, what are you and your Husband's build like? if your small she may well just be following her natural
      curve.

      How do you think she is? is she happy, content, wet and dirty nappies? This is SO much more important than a scale.

      I know someone said it was supposed to be easier for babies to bottle feed but I just don't think that's true, I saw a bf adviser with my first and she said that it Bf is so much easier as the let-down is like a tap turning on and it pours down there throat.

      Whatever you decide only YOU know what's best for your daughter and you're doing a great job



    3. #13
      Weeble emgem
      Location
      Decorating Hell
      Posts
      3,501

      Re: :-( G has lost an ounce. Not sure if I can carry on.

      I couldn't read this and not post, you sound so sad

      I've been exactly where you are and so have many more on here. We know how hard it is when things don't go to plan so keep on brain dumping.

      I'm not going to post a load of advice about supply and weight gain etc etc as you've had fab advice already.

      But what I will say is, from experience, you need to make a decision. Either do as Faith did and go by if your baby is happy, alert, weeing lots and having dirty names which are all good signs they are nutrionally ok. And then stop weighing her or at least drop it to once every 3/4 weeks.

      Or think you've given it a good shot at bf'ing but you can bring yourself to formula feed her and make your peace with it.

      I promise once you have an action plan in mind and stick to it you will feel much better. These newborn baby days pass so quickly and to spend them in despair and upset like you are is so sad.

      I've been just where you are as I said before, tears rolling down my face because my DD had only gained half of what she should have done and the HV was threatening to get her admitted to hospital and put on a drip if I didn't top her up with formula. I put myself under immense pressure to bf and I was doing well at it but because DD didn't follow a line they labelled her as "failing to thrive" which made me feel like a complete failure.

      For the record too my dinky little lady is now 7, bright as a button but still very petite. She weighs four pounds more than her younger brother (3.5 yr gap) and is still wearing age 4-5 clothes. Thats just her build.

      I hope you can come to a decision that you feel happy with
      Emgem xxx





      64 Pounds Lost NO Pounds to go

    4. #14

      Re: :-( G has lost an ounce. Not sure if I can carry on.

      Quote Originally Posted by emgem View Post
      tears rolling down my face because my DD had only gained half of what she should have done and the HV was threatening to get her admitted to hospital and put on a drip if I didn't top her up with formula. I put myself under immense pressure to bf and I was doing well at it but because DD didn't follow a line they labelled her as "failing to thrive" which made me feel like a complete failure.
      It's unsurprising really that breastfeeding rates are so low in this country, when the sole focus is on weight, charts, and comparison to formula fed babies. Especially when the solution to every hiccup is formula. I am astounded at how uniniformed people are , including health professionals- who are usually the worst as they are professing their ignorance from a place of power, and you need to be really strong willed to go against a so called expert. Threatening a drip because a baby doesn't gain x amount of weight is bullying, and makes me really angry.

      From Day 1 in hospital I was given a row for not bringing formula with me, and I was constantly asked if I wanted someone to go and get a bottle, to "give myself a break". Yes she fed constantly, but no-one ever told me that was normal. All the time I breastfed people asked me when I was going to stop, hadn't I done enough. When she cried, or wanted feeding again, I was told maybe my milk wasn't rich enough, and maybe she'd be better on a bottle. I should top up, give a bottle in the evening, have a break..

      I got pretty pissed off in the end, and just wanted to shout "I want to breastfeed, my baby is healthy, we are doing fine, I don't want or need a break, and I don't want to give formula. Her feeding habits are normal, weight gain is normal, and not sleeping through is normal. So go away".

      I also got pretty pissed off with all the people who would comment on the breastfeeding, and then give me some half assed reason on why they couldn't. Stuff like you can't breastfeed a baby if they're over 10 lbs, or if they don't sleep through by 6 weeks you have a supply problem, or if they need feeding more frequently than 3 hourly you have a supply problem.

      If your baby is healthy, using your brains rather than a scale, and you want to stick with it, stick with it

      /rant

    5. #15
      Damsel Diva creamcracker
      Location
      In Mark Owen's pocket!
      Posts
      3,418

      Re: :-( G has lost an ounce. Not sure if I can carry on.

      Thank you all so much for your replies and support . I really don't know what I would do without Damsels!
      I got myself worked up in to such a state earlier that I couldn't see the wood for the trees. I'm a very anxious person anyway but pregnancy and the newborn stage make me go loopy !

      Anyway, I saw the lovely BF councillor today who reassured me and showed me some techniques for improving G's feeding. Basically G hasn't been latched properly so has been struggling to get what she needs. She sat with me and showed me biological nursing positions and straight away you could hear G gulping where she had mouthfuls of milk .
      My plan is to persevere until Thursday weigh in and go from there. If it's static or a loss we'll introduce another bottle. I'm going to try and stay relaxed about the whole thing and focus on G as she is happy as larry! My HV is lovely and supportive and isn't overly worried yet so hopefully it's not quite the end just yet.

      Berte2, I'll have a read of the link later, thank you!

      It's good to hear from you about your LO's who are petite etc and were slow gainers as I believe this is how our little lady will be. I'm petite myself and my mum said I was exactly like Gwen so I guess it makes sense.

      Thank you all again so much.



    6. #16

      Re: :-( G has lost an ounce. Not sure if I can carry on.

      Quote Originally Posted by creamcracker View Post

      My plan is to persevere until Thursday weigh in and go from there.
      Are you weighing twice a week? Seriously that is wrong, wrong, wrong, and no way will she have gained enough to register on the scales. Even if she has gained you will need incredibly accurate scales just to overcome user error and inbuilt standard error on these type of scales.

      Weighing that regularly will lead to madness. You will not see a meaningful gain that way. It needs to be minimum bi-weekly. Don't put yourself through it.

      OK. If you don't have the self-confidence to just not go, my plan of action in this situation would be to ask your HV what the point of stressing you out like this is. Tell her it's going to be a vicious circle, stress is going to affect your successful breastfeeding. Ask her exactly how much she expects your baby to put on in 3 days, and ask her when she last calibrated the scales, and could the difference, gain or loss, be accounted for by simple standard error (The answer is yes- just think about weighing an oz of flour on your home scales, it's that accurate )

      If she objects, and insists on twice weekly weighing, ask her what exactly is she looking for, and if she's that worried about your DD's weight gain, isn't it time for a paediatric referral? Then I'd refuse to see her again until I'd seen a GP or paediatrician, who can explain exactly what they are hoping to diagnose, and do the appropriate tests.

      If she hasn't gained why do they think formula is the answer? What exactly is magic about formula that will overcome any sort of real medical issue?

      Honestly creamcracker, nothing you do will help if you weigh twice a week. It doesn't matter how often she feeds, or her latch, a bf baby will just not gain enough in 3 days. I doubt a FF baby would either, but I'm willing to bet no-one has every suggested a FF baby be weighed that often.

      Sheesh. See my earlier post. I am cross again now.

    7. #17

      Re: :-( G has lost an ounce. Not sure if I can carry on.

      I have no experience whatsoever, but you seemed so upset earlier, so just wanted to send a hug. You seem a bit more positive during your last post, and you sound like you're doing a great job. Our bodies fluctuate in weight and I'm sure that's similar for babies, so although it's important to monitor, please don't take this as the only indicator of how well G is feeding.

      ETA: I do agree with Faith that weighing twice a week does seem excessive.
      Last edited by sticky_honey87; 30-04-2012 at 10:08pm.
      sticky_honey87

    8. #18
      Ignoring the rain LibertyGal72
      Location
      South East
      Posts
      3,687

      Re: :-( G has lost an ounce. Not sure if I can carry on.

      Oh honey I've absolutely no advice but needed to give you a squeeze.
      libertygal


      Kathy Lette: ...women are each other's human Wonderbras uplifting, supportive and making each other look bigger and better.

    9. #19
      Damsel Diva
      Location
      here & there
      Posts
      27,493

      Re: :-( G has lost an ounce. Not sure if I can carry on.

      couldn't read and not post.
      Glad your session with the bf counsellor went well. Agree with faith about the twice weekly weigh ins. Dd1 was about15-16wks when a temp HV put her on weekly weigh ins, when her regular HV came back she was shocked we'd been put on weeklys as "there is clearly nothing wrong here, look how happy she is!".

    10. #20

      Re: :-( G has lost an ounce. Not sure if I can carry on.

      Weighing twice a week is madness, I had a similar issue with W. I knew there was nothing wrong he was alert had plenty of wet and dirty nappies just didn't put on weight at any speed. I had a health visitor trying to tell me that although he was my 4th bf child I should considered switching to formula as I was older now (31) and the quality of my milk may not be as good as the it was the other 3 times. After that day I refused to have him weighed anymore and he is and as always been fine, he just does not put on weight at any speed.
      If she is having wet and dirty nappies(not green) and is alert and has periods of being awake I really wouldn't be concerned about a small loss. I would stop weighing at such short intervals, only weigh once a month unless you have any other reasons to be concerned.

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