Did you change your name when you got married?

[bubbasweet]

Just wondering. I'm not sure if I want to (getting married in May). My surname feels like it's part of me and I feel a bit agrieved at the assumption by practically everyone that I will be changing it. Aside from that, it means that i'll have the same name as Mr BS's sister if I do change it - at the moment I'm unique but I definitely won't be if I change it. Several people have been totally aghast at the idea of me keeping my own name

Is it such an odd thing for a woman to not take her husband's name these days?

How would it work practically do you think?

[Muppetgal]

I sort of did, I basically flip flop between the names. In Scotland it's easy though, you can be whoever you want really, so on some things I'm still my old name, on others I'm my married name and on even others I'm both, using my original surname as a middle name.

I haven't decided yet what I want to be, I kinda like having multiple personalities!

[Roo]

I changed mine, but that was because *I* wanted to. I have two aunts, neither of whom has changed their name, so there wasn't the same 'expectation' from family, but I wanted to anyway

In this day and age, it should make no odds, and to all intents and purposes I don't think it does. You will get *some* confusion over 'are you married or not?', and if you have children you WILL get called Mrs XsurnameX by schools as they just seem incapable of getting it right, from all I've heard. But if you can live with that (or it's not an issue of course) then otherwise I'm not sure what odds it makes Most people already know you, know your name, know your relationship, so what's the difference?

FWIW I can't really say WHY I wanted to change mine, I just did! And I've had some people (at work - I'm an academic) express surprise that I changed it, as in this environment it's the norm to NOT change your name, especially if you've got research papers in maiden name as well (which I have). I just figure anyone searching the literature will find me, one way or another

[Tgirl]

Yeah i changed mine...i felt more strongly about myself and any children that we were lucky enough to have to have the same surname...i felt more strong about this than i did my maiden name so therefore changed it...however this is just my opinion .... i dont think its a big deal for anyone to keep their maiden name these days so if you want to keep yours then do keep it

[Ajedrez]

I changed mine. My old surname was so common (as in only a notch above Smith and Jones in the popularity stakes) and husband's surname is MUCH nicer and a lot less popular and I always like to be different

I also think it's nice to have the same surname, I never really worried about the submissiveness of taking his name. I don't think it's odd NOT to take it though, do what you want. What does he think of you keeping your name?

[Samba]

I changed mine ... my maiden name was awful, so it was a relief to get rid

[Adelelee]

yes I did, it means a lot to me that we all have the same name.

xx

[popinjay1]

I changed my name. I think I am very old fashioned at heart and wanted to have the same name as my husband. And children.

I can see why some people wouldnt want to though. You do whats right for you.

It helped that I really didnt like my maiden name anyway so maybe I might have been less keen if I had a maiden name I loved?

[Tekkencat]

i changed mine first time around and intend to 2nd time - but thats just me I feel strongly about changing it BUT - if you dont want to then dont (works both ways) - i know sounds simple doesnt it - stuff those who dont agree with you - you're the one who is using it on a daily basis afterall

[Micah]

I didn't change mine

Some people have a hard time getting their heads round it (i.e Dh's rellies who can't figure out how to address Christmas cards ) but otherwise have no problems.

I don't think it's odd at all. A lot of people don't change their named for various reasons, and many aren't married at all so it's not unusual for a couple to have different surnames....