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Very high chance husband is infertile :(

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  • Very high chance husband is infertile :(

    Two things first of all. One - I didn't want to post this in the parenting forum as I don't think I could face going into that forum to get the updates, and Two - I'm sorry that my first post is seeking help and not offering it myself!

    Well basically, it says it in the title. We have been trying for over a year and DH went to the dr for another reason and was discussing this with the Dr. she said it was a fairly easy test so he took a sample to the hospital to be tested. The results came back "inconclusive" so he did it again and the Dr. said there was no sperm and referred him to the urology dept at the hospital. He had the appointment today and the Dr. took one look at his testicles and said they were very small and it appears that they stopped growing and it's very unlikely he will have any sperm in there.

    They've taken a blood test and booked him in for another appt in 6 weeks but it's pretty damning.

    I really don't know how I feel about it, when I first found out it was a possibility I was shocked but not upset, I tend to be positive and think of the upsides so we joked that maybe we would have more money to spend on holidays. But today when he told me I feel like I could cry at any moment. More from the shock than I've actually considered what my future looks like without children.

    I suppose I just wanted to get this off of my chest really and perhaps get some advice from someone who's been there?

    Again, sorry that this is my first post - I was an avid bagger but didn't really transfer onto here. Just in need of some help really.

    Thank you all xx

  • #2
    Re: Very high chance husband is infertile :(

    I'm sorry I don't have any advice, it is hard to know what to say tbh. It must have come as a hell of a shock and of course you are going to be full of emotions. Is there anything that the Dr's can do for your husband?


    • #3
      Re: Very high chance husband is infertile :(


      There are lots of options so don't give up hope yet...there are treatments like ICSI (a variant of IVF) if he has a few sperm; donor sperm or adoption if has absolutely none (which is quite rare)....

      We didn't have your specific issue but we were unable to conceive so went on to adopt. In some ways its good to have a reason that you are not conceiving - it can be much harder when there is no reason....and it still doesn't happen.

      I suspect the next steps will be further tests for him and also tests for you to check everything is OK there, then you can decide what's next.



      • #4
        Re: Very high chance husband is infertile :(

        Thank you both for replying. Bop you are right - after some more googling I found that this isn't necessarily the end of the road. I feel calmer today. It's upsetting but I'm generally a very positive person so I know I'll be able to cope with this.

        My DH on the other hand suffers from depression and he is very down since hearing the news. I am doing all I can to comfort him but it's going to be a long rd. he should get his next appt through for around 6 weeks time so I'll go along with him then.

        In the meantime my sister already knows we had the appt booked so I'll tell her and I need to tell my mum. She was putting off booking her summer holiday in case I was pregnant :( I think it's going to be very upsetting for her.


        • #5
          Re: Very high chance husband is infertile :(

          Oh gosh, what a shock for you As Bop says, there are options, but of course you weren't expecting this and it will take a bit of getting used to.

          As for your hubbie, yes I imagine that would depress a man. Is he OK with you telling your sister and mum? Maybe it's not something he wants everyone knowing and talking about just yet?


          • #6
            Re: Very high chance husband is infertile :(

            Thanks Damsella. Yes he is fine with it. He's told his mum when he had the first test and is happy for me to tell my family. I'll need to pick my timing though and I'm not seeing them for a few weeks so won't be immediate.


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