I won't be testing tomorrow...

[Minky]

...as AF arrived this morning.

I knew it in the middle of last week, and even though I've been through it all before, it doesn't make it any easier.

Mr Minky has to work today and it's cripplingly hard on both of us. Couldn't stop crying at church today.

Why haven't my prayers been answered?
Am I such a crap mummy that no little soul out there wants me to be their mother?
Will I only hear mummy from one little voice?
Why has this happened when everything was going so well?
Did I not want it enough?
Could I have done more to make it happen?

I wish I knew the answers to these questions.

I just wish someone could tell me why these last three attempts haven't worked. Maybe then I could accept it and move on.

Sorry for the downer. I will pick up soon, just not right now. I guess I have to get my grieving out of the way before normal service resumes.

Minky

[bisy backson]

:higgies:

thinking of you

bbxx

[calgal]

Oh Minky,

I am so so sorry to hear this. Please do not blame yourself. You did your absolute best and don't doubt this at all.

No words i type are going to make this easier on you, but do know i am thinking of you and that we are here if there is anyway we can help.

Life can be so so unfair sometimes.

thinking of you.

xxx

[Pancake01]

:hug: Sorry AF came this morning.

[dora the ex...]

aww no im so sorry af arrived xxx

[Angel]

:hugs:

I don't know what to say - take care of yourself and Mr Minky.

[Princess Fiona]

Oh Minky i'm SO sorry to hear this. I really don't know what to say. Thinking of you this weekend. :higgies:

[Starlight]

I'm so sorry, I was really hoping it had worked for you. Thinking of you and Mr Minky.

[Waxy Bean]

:hug: :hug: :hug: So sorry hun

xx

[Cherrypie]

Oh, Minky. I'm so so sorry that this wasn't to be your time. So many of us have been hoping and praying so much for you.

Please don't blame yourself. There just aren't answers to your questions - though I don't blame you for asking them. You're a wonderful mummy. You and Mr Minky are great parents - Lulah is testement to that. You both so deserve to be parents again. I just don't know why this hasn't happened this time, and I'm confused and angry on your behalf.

And don't apologise for having a downer! You need time to come to terms with all that has happened - and you must take all the time you need.

Thinking of you and Mr Minky.

Much love.

Cerise. xx

[Azana]

How absolutely heart breaking :-(

A x

PS have just phoned you and left what I hope is a fairly neutral message as I don't know whether M knows you have told people about your treatment or not.

PPS It sucks and is nothing you didn't do

[Cupcake's Mum]

hi minky,

im so sorry AF arrived lots of love and hugs
gina
~X~:grouphug: :hug: :higgies:

[Amethyst]

I`m so sorry to hear this:higgies: :higgies: :higgies: .

Amethyst x

[zwinnie]

Minky, I am so, so sorry to hear this news and have been thinking about you all week. Life is so bloody cruel sometimes and of course you're bound to have all these questions going through your head.

Please rest up, cry, scream, rant, do whatever you need to do and remember that we're all here for you.

Love to Mr Minky and Lulah too.

xxx

[littlepinkpiglet]

So sorry Minky. All I can offer is some :choc: and some :higgies: Don't apologise at all - you need this time to grieve and you need all the support you can get.:kiss:

[half-full]

I don't know what to say. :higgies:

[parkejm]

Oh Minky, you must be devastated. I'm so sorry to hear this.
Big big hugs to you both

janice x

[schnapps]

Minky - I'm so sorry. Words don't really help in what you are going through.

Hugs to you all and take lots of care.

[Mrs Bunny]

So sorry to hear your news. :grouphug:
Take care of yourselves.
Mrs B

[shamu]

Oh darling....
I'm so very, very sorry :kiss:
:hug: for all three of you at this difficult time
FWIW I think you DO know the answers to those questions:
Why haven't my prayers been answered? There is just no reason, it's just one of those things, horrible and unfair as it is.....
Am I such a crap mummy that no little soul out there wants me to be their mother? Well, if I could chose a mummy, it would be someone exactly like you. You are so warm, affectionate, caring and kind that EVERY child would want you as their mummy. If I ever want to sell one of mine, you can have first refusal.
Will I only hear mummy from one little voice? Never say never, in life nothing is guaranteed.....
Why has this happened when everything was going so well? See my answer to the first question
Did I not want it enough? You KNOW you wanted this more than anything else at the moment otherwise why would you even be posting this..... PLEASE don't even try to blame yourself
Could I have done more to make it happen? There isn't anything you could have done that would have MADE it happen. I suppose it wasn't meant to happen this time but that doesn't make it any easier to accept/come to terms with/cope with etc You have done everything in your power to help yourself and you shouldn't even question that.

I don't know what else I can say except I'm sitting here :cry: on your behalf. There isn't anyone I can think of who deserves this but especially not you. I hope time will help you and you find your strength wherever you can :flowers:

Please, please let me know if there is anything I can do for you
Lots of love
Shamu
:wink:

[phoenix]

So sorry Minky.

phoenix
xx

[katkinn]

:cry: words can't express how utterly sorry I am for both of you.

With all the love in the world.

you know where I am

katkinn
xxx

[Fantasseee]

Poor you! I don't know what to say but i wanted you to know im so sorry this IVF attempt didn't work :higgies:

[bluekat]

Oh bollocks.

Thinking of you Minky.

BKx

[ms sweetcheeks]

Oh Minks, so sorry to hear this, I had everything crossed for you.
Who knows why it hasn't happened this time, no-one can tell you that.

You're such a fab mummy to a beautiful girl, and you deserve to have your biggest wish granted.:fingerscrossed: :higgies:

Hope it happens one day Minky

[August Girl]

I'm so sorry Minky, I was really hoping that this was your turn.

Lots of hugs :hugs: You are a fab mummy.

[Littlejojo]

:hugs:

[*Fallen Angel*]

So sorry Minky.

:flowers:

[sparkliness]

I'm so sorry sweetie,

Take care,

Sparkliness xx

[lewpylew]

Oh sweetie,

I am so so sorry and whatever I say will probably not make you feel better.

Life is soooooo unfair.

Thinking of you and M

Lewpy x x

[MsNat]

So sorry to hear this.

[Chickpea]

Oh I'm so sorry to have read this - this all seems so incredibly unfair!

I wish you all the strength in the world to get through it

cpx

[DillyDally]

Oh Minky, I'm so sorry. I will pray really hard for you next Sunday at church. If you pm me your real name, I'll ask the other Sunday group leaders to pray for you too. You don't have to, if you don't want to, I'll still ask them to pray for you.
((hugs))

[Adelelee]

Sweetheart, I am at a loss what I can say to make it better for you, nothing can erase the hurt and pain I know you and Mr Minky are feeling right now.

But please DONT EVER think its your fault, nature is a bitch, you and Mr M are amazing parents, Lulah is testament to that.

IVF is a crap crap thing, and I wish I had answers to your questions, but I dont, all I can say is I think you are an amazing woman, you mean the world to me, and if I could wave a wand to make it better I would in a heartbeat.

All my love always

Adele
xxxxxx

[natacha]

:flowers: and :hug:

love natacha

[Biba]

:higgies: I am so sorry that AF arrived minky

[cheeky_biscuit]

I'm so sorry Minky
x

[BJMac]

I'm so sorry Minky :-(

[ChelseaHarvey]

Awwww minky i am so sorry that AF came..

Thinking of you, and dont feel bad about being on a downer :flowers:

[tekkencat]

Thinking of you xx

[Lois Lane]

I don't know what to say sweetheart except that life fecking well SUCKS sometimes. The questions you ask are all 100% valid but I sadly don't know the answers. I know it's easy for us all to say but the blame does NOT lay at your door hon, nobody can explain why this happens, especially to a couple so loving and caring and who really deserve this break.

(((((HUGE HUGS)))))))) to you, Mr M and Lulah.

Lois xxxxx

[Annie Goolahey]

So, so, so sorry to hear this news Minky.
Please allow yourself time to grieve, but don't blame yourself.

Take care,
L
x

[Hungry Hippo]

I was so sorry to read this Minky. I don't have any wise words but really wanted to send you :hugs:. Take care of yourself and please don't feel bad about talking time to grieve.
HH xx

[popinjay1]

I have no idea what to say but am thinking of you all right now. life can so suck sometimes :-(

[Violet]

Have been thinking of you all weekend Minky. I'm so sorry to hear this! :-(

[sunshine]

I'm so so sorry Minky. My heart is breaking for you :-(

[Henrietta Figg]

I'm sorry about your news, we were all gunning for you and your family, whatever happens in the future, you know that you have tried your utmost to make this work, sometimes life is unbearably hard isn't it?

[Jelly]

that's really sucky... so sorry Minky. No understanding why things work out the way they do sometimes. Life seems very unfair... :hug:

[Blonde Girl]

Oh god my love I am so so so desperately sorry to read this, cannot believe how shite life can be sometimes.

All my love

cathy xxxxxx

[*kate*]

Sorry this wasn't the news you wanted Minky :hug:

[silverpod]

Minky, I am so sorry.

SP :higgies:

[Julesb]

I'm so sorry Minky.

Please take care.

[Florence]

I'm so sorry Minky. Take care of yourself, and Mr Minky, too, as you will really need each other's support at the moment.

Florence
xxx

[Alycat]

Minky I am so sorry to hear you terrible news. Hope you, mr Minky and Lulah are bearing up well at what must be a very stressful time.

My thoughts are with you all

Love
Aly

[frog]

Minky that's such sad news, I'm so sorry for you and your DH.

[Swingo]

Aw Minky, I am so sorry to hear what happened. :kiss:

[Devil Girl]

Awe Minky :higgies: :flowers:

[RedTiger]

:-( So sorry Minky :hugs: to you & Mr Minky :flowers:

[Mad Madam Mim]

Sad to hear this Minky. My thoughts are with you and your family.

Mim x

[guinness]

i'm so sorry it didn't work minky, i am thinking of you
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Skibunny]

Minky I'm so sorry - I can't imagine how awful you feel. The one thing I do know is that the IVF not working has nothing to do with anything you or Mr Minky has or has not done - you have done everything you can. Like everyone says, you are a wonderful mummy - I genuinely can't think of anyone who does a better job than you and no-one could have more love to give.

I wish I could make it better for you.

Skibunny
xx

[Miss P]

Oh, Minky, so very sorry to hear your news. No words can really help but just wanted to send much love to you and Mr Minky at this time.

Miss P
x

[spritzer]

I'm so sorry it has not worked for you and Mr Minky this time. Give your Lulah a huge cuddle and draw your strength from her love.

Life is incredibly unfair sometimes and nothing you did had any effect on the outcome.

You are in my thoughts and prayers that you get the answers you need and the result you crave.

Spritzer x

[Ladyluck]

Minky I am so sorry to see this thead.

Am thinking about you and hoping that your time comes very soon :higgies: :flowers:

[noo noo]

Huge (((((HUGS))))) for you and Mr Minky you must both be absolutely devestated - and deservedly so. There is nothing you could have done differently to have changed the outcome. As difficult as it is to come to terms with please try not to blame yourself. There are no answers to your questions and no blame can be apportioned. Life is just sometimes unbearably unfair. We have all been hoping and praying along with you all the way and share your pain. Please come here and rant and rave about it as much as you want. We will always be here for you in good times and bad. I am in tears for you and so wish I could make it better. You are a tremendously strong woman and a fabulous mother. Take all the time you need to decide on the next step and we will support you 110% of the way. I truly believe your wishes will come true on this roller coaster ride. At the moment you must be truly emotionally and physically exhausted, you have been down a torturous road that has been filled with nothing but dissapointment after dissapointment. You have suffered a loss and need to take time to grieve for the physical loss and the loss of your dreams. Everything you are feeling is a normal reaction to an abnormal situation and you have every right to feel angry, dissapointed, heartbroken and frustrated. Take every day as it comes and seek support as and when you need it. If there is anything I or anyone else can do for you, you only have to ask. Take care. xxxxxx

[shining star]

I'm absolutely heartbroken for you Minky, so sorry to hear this news.

Lots of love to you, Mr M and Lulah :hug:

ss
xx

[Tazdevil]

oh cr=p - just logged on and saw this :no:

I don't think a bunch of in effect strangers could have wished this for you more :no: that's really shit-y to say the least and no you couldn't have done anything more to bring it about.

Testing times for you and Mr Minky, but you'll find the strength and courage from somewhere honey - you really will. Like you say, you need to grieve for this first, but....well..........it just sucks it reallly does - so sorry

[flipflop]

Minky I'm so sorry to hear your news, I know how devastated you feel.
flipflop x

[Angie]

Sorry to hear this Mnky. It's not your fault though, so please don't blame yourself.

Thinking of you :hug:

[cartchick]

I'm so so sorry. How devastating for you and Mr Minky.

:hug: to you both.
ccxx

[Sonriendo]

So sorry to read this Minky.

Love
X

[redhed]

Oh Minky, I'm so sorry. Just logged on from France`specifically to see how you were doing, have been thinking about you a lot.

Sometimes life is just like this. I think you had on paper the best chance of conceiving you could think of - good embryos, body that had got it right before, you did all the right things. Certainally if all our hopes and prayers counted for anything you would be pg now. But it's just another game of Russian Roulette, hun - the numbers can be in your favour but even so every now and then someone gets shot. I know it's human nature to blame yourself and look for reasons - but there are none. It just sucks, that's all.

Gotta go - French dial-up - but love to you all from us and the Woos.

[Princess Lollipop]

Minky

Words don't seem adequate at a time like this but you, Mr Minky & Lulah are all in my thoughts. Life really is unfair at times and it is always the goods one that get hurt the most.

Take care
PLxx

[Rez]

I'm sorry to hear your news, it seems so unfair. Thinking of you x

[Lily Luna]

Minky.

So sorry to hear this. Take care.

Sassy.x.

[Redsquare]

I hate life sometimes and this is one of those times.

I so wanted this to happen for you and Mr Minky.

Thinking of you all.

[bluecow]

I am late to this thread but I wanted to add my :higgies: too.

IVF is a consuming and at times like this torturing, time and I am so sorry that it hasn't worked for you this time.

You, Mr Minky and the lovely Lulah are in my thoughts.

xxxxx

[Mad Cow]

Oh Minky :higgies: :higgies: :higgies: :higgies: :higgies: :higgies: :higgies:

Thinking of you and Mr Minky - we are here for you when you are ready.

[gizamojo]

Oh Minky. I really don't know what to say. I am so gutted to be reading this post as I really thought that life would play fair for once and you would get your prayers answered. Thinking of you and your family and sending out lots of hugs and love to you. Please do not worry about feeling down as you will need time to come to terms with this and please don't blame yourself.

Take care xxxxx

[Puddy C]

Minky - am so very sorry to see this. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Puddy

xx

[Kerzen]

Thinking of you as well.
xxx

[book_lover]

oh darling :hugs: we all luff you very much here and I reckon that everyone here is going to be so gutted for you, I know I am. I've been thinking about you lots on hols and hoping it had worked out for you. I don't know the answers to any of your questions either, but I am sending you lots of love xxxxxxxxxxxxx

[WoollyNewty]

Minky I am absolutley gutted for you. It is so goddam flippin unfair. If there was any justice in this world then you wouldn't be here now writing this but sometimes life just sucks and there is nothing I can say that will make any of this any easier. We are all here for you, always, through whatever you go through in your life and we really really care about you - that is a testament to what a loving, generous, funny, clever and wonderful human being you are. You have touched so many people's lifes in such a positive way over the last few years and we all truely care about you. I know you will be in a dark place right now but try to remember that.

All my love,

xxx