View Full Version : Travl with lo- anyone else feel they just can't do it?
Sorry if this gets long,
Just been away to a wedding this weekend. We travelled down on the Friday night and decided that we'd give C his tea, do bath bottle, get him ready for bed, etc and then take him out with us so we could have something to eat, hoping he'd sleep in his buggy.
Well, he went to sleep at normal time, but an hour later woke up and that was it, he couldn't get back off to sleep. So it ende up with him being awake while we had dinner. Fortunately we were tired and ready for an early night so we headed back to the hotel. But he took ages to settle to sleep, DH had to hold him in his arms till he was sound asleep and then put him down. It was 10.10pm, and he still woke at 6.30am!
Now, DH is on about us going on holiday, but I really don't think I can do it. It seems that C is not one of those kids who will sleep anywhere if he needs to, and I'm not sure him being awake till 10-11at night for a week or 2 will do him any good at all.
What can we do?
Ohhh god I feel the EXACT same now that I actually am on holiday.
I really wish I'd never gone, everything is so up in the air, and out of the 6 nights we've slept here 4 or 5 have been nightmares with Theo falling asleep normal time and then waking 20mins-1hour after and then being awake, either screaming or wanting to play until gone 10pm.
And because I refuse to take him out of the dark room (he'll then think it's day time) I then feel all ym evenings are spend in a dark room, doing absolutely feck all- GREAT:no:
All in all, it's been a total nightmare, although last night he settled at 7, and slept to 7am this morning, so here's hoping the next 2 weeks will be better.
But I AM 100% with you on that!
Moffgal, everyone I'v spoken to says the kids WILL settle after a while, which in my (Theo's) case has taken a week now, we came last monday.
Saturday night I wanted to kill him (sorry) and I was in floods of tears, I was SOOOOO frustrated.
I'm sure the 2nd week would be ok, just be prepared to adjust when you get back home again...
It's not the actual being on holiday that I find unbearable, it's the travelling to and from holiday. Last year we did London-Atlanta-Florida when P was 14 months old and it was a nightmare, however NOTHING prepared me for how bad it would be this year at 2 yrs, 1 month when she really was an absolute HORROR. I cried for most of the outbound journey as she was peeing off the other passengers and I was embarrassed and tired (and 7 weeks pg!). DH is talking about doing the trip next year with TWO of them:faint:
We travelled to Australia and New Zealand in April when Dylan was 16 months, and the journey was absolutely fine, surprisingly!!
He generally doesn't have much trouble sleeping in a strange place, so once he's in his cot he's absolutely fine. He's not great at sleeping in his buggy if we're out in the evenings, but I wouldn't let it stop me going away. I think its just a matter of choosing carefully where you're going and whether its suitable to have a baby awake if they do wake up. Although there have been times when he refuses to go asleep, and I feel like throttling him!!
We haven't taken him on the kind of holiday where we've been in a resort and go out for dinner every night. In Aus we were mostly staying with family and tended to stay in and bbq. In NZ we used a babysitting agency so that we could go out in the evenings and catch up with friends. We also went skiing in January and we were able to put him to sleep in our room and checked on him regularly while we had dinner and maybe a couple of drinks in the bar.
I've done it twice and apart from a few full scale screaming fits on the plane it was fine.
However, I think that unless you have a newborn who either will or won't sleep regardless of where they are, or are one of the lucky few who have a baby that will sleep in a buggy and then happily transfer into a cot at bedtime then your only choice is self catering (or staying with people).
Personally I don't like it when I see lots of little people crashed out in buggies in bars and restaurants - these are adult places at night:no:
Our compromise is to go out for lunch and then cook in the evening. OK, you don't get to spend your evening in the bar but holidays are somewhat different with children. You can always get a baby sitter for a big night on hols and the days are fun anyway.
It's such a short time IMO before they are able to stay up a bit later that it isn't a great sacrifice.
I realise I sound like a lentil knitter but bedtime routine and clear boundaries between adult time and child time are really important to me and my family.
I actually found not having any proper chilling out time in the day harder than the evenings anyway - I would love to sit and read my book for hours but that just isn't going to happen for the foreseeable future.
I think the thing I'd feel most comfortable with is if we rented an apartment so we could just put C to bed and have a meal and drinks on the balcony.
We hired a sitter for the night of the wedding so that was fine. But there was a little girl around C's age who was downstairs, with her parents, fast asleep in her buggy- I was so jealous! If C would do that I'd have no worries at all about going away on hols.
DH says he will get used to it if we go away, but he's a lot more relaxed than me, I get stressed if he's not asleep at the 'right' time! I guess I have to learn that on hols I just have to let things slide a bit.
I think holidays with a LO are completely different to pre-baby holidays! If you accept that yes they'll scream on the plane, won't go to bed at desired time & will eat carp for a week or so but on the plus side development-wise it seems to really stimulate them!
Apartments are a lot easier imo, esp. if you have a seperate room for LO - in Florida we had such a lovely time - family meals on the boardwalk watching the dolphins, then we'd put Em to bed in the living room, get ourselves a couple of margarita's and sit on the balcony listening to the pool bar music (watching all the smug-childless ones having fun :teehee: ).
Going away with friends to a cottage or villa helps with what to do in the evenings - you all stay in together and cook and drink wine, or you babysit for each other's children so you and your dh get a night out alone.
The thought of airports with my two makes me shudder so all our hols for the forseeable future will be in the UK, we are renting a cottage in Dorset in August with some friends we went away with last year. The children played together really well, all the adults had time to do their own thing (my friend and I played golf, had a few drinks after and when we got back the men had fed, bathed and put the children to bed and were sorting out a bbq for us girls).
Dh and I went out for dinner on our own one night, the other couple did too, and the rest of the time we'd chuck the kids into bed, open wine and beer and have a lovely adults only evening of food and drink sitting in the garden under the stars. Highly recommended.
We've just had a fab time in a cottage in Wales. We put Maisie to bed at her normal time and she was fine. In the evening, we either cooked for ourselves and ate it outside on the patio with candles (v romantic, although you had to wear a jumper), went round to a friend's who lived next door, taking the baby monitor with us, and went out one night when our friend's mum babysat for us.
We've never even tried to take Laura out in the evening and have her drop off in the pushchair. We've had two fantastic holidays (Majorca at 11mths, Fuerteventura at 23mths) and both times we've stuck with her normal routine. I know some would say we should do what we want and she has to fit in, but she likes her routine and it's no bother to me if we eat dinner at 6.30pm so she can be back and in bed at 7.30pm as per normal! Actually Majorca was best as one hour ahead, and we left her on UK time so she was actually going until 8.30pm and was none the wiser :wink: :sunglasses:
Laura has always slept like a dream on holiday, and I'm sure sticking with her routine helps with that. If she had an hour in a pushchair and then woke up I know she'd be a nightmare, so easier for us just not to bother trying that!
This is my sticking point. Can I ask you, when you went on hols with your lo and kept her in her routine of being in bed by 7.30, does that mean that you were in the room from then on too?
Because this is the problem I have. Take the last time we went away. We were in a Travel Inn, all sleeping in one room, and they don't have a bar or anything that we could sit in with the monitor. And there was no way we were going to bed at 6.45 like C does! So we had to take him out with us and hope for the best.
And what if you go away and the room is too far away from where you can go and sit up for the monitor to work, what do you do? I'm interested to find out as I'd love to find a solution, it'd make me relax about the whole thing no end. What are the Scotland megameet gals doing for instance?
We've travelled a few times with Lu at various ages and i can honestly say i've never really had a problem with her sleep. Yes she will wake up at night if we're out but tbh she's totally out of her routine on holiday anyway so its expected. She isn't that often a problem to get back to sleep.
The actual travelling is not that bad either, we did an 11 hour flight when she was 15 months and she actually slept for over 1/2 of it even though it wasn't her time to sleep iyswim.
I'm totally of the opinion that if you want to make travelling/holidays with a baby/toddler, then you will get problems, if you can try and be a bit more relaxed about his routine then it will soon fall into place, try not to worry about when he'll sleep etc etc, go away and enjoy yourself.
Can I stick my oar in? I agree with Katy actually - whenerver we've been on holiday the LO has just fitted in.
AT home we are sticklers for routine, even the older two are in bed at around 8pm every night, but when we go on holiday I really view it as a holiday for all of us, and that means if their routine is broken, well it's not really going to matter for a couple of weeks.
Yes, you'll have to deal with a baby/toddler until 11pm at night, but that's having kids :smile: . I really value "us time" when we're at home and that's why I insist on bedtime but on holiday I relax a bit and let the kids stay up until they're tired. We don't really do the big drinking thing anyway as I find alcohol and heat don't mix (actually alcohol and me don't mix :laff: ) but tend to all have a sleep at around 4-6pm and get ready and go out for a meal at around 8.30ish.
Our LO's have always toddled around until they were tired, and then slept in the buggy - they always woke when transferring them to bed, but as we were going to bed at around the same time they settled quite quickly. And on coming back home we have reinstated the routine immediately and they were always ok with that.
But each to their own and what suits one family won't necessarily suit another.
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