GGRRRR Damn MIL spilled the beans

[Lois Lane]

Found out when we were on holiday that MIL had dinner with her circle of friends and told them all about the new baby - DESPITE me asking her not to tell anyone.:angry: Furious was not the word. She casually dropped it into conversation when I had her on speakerphone when she was talking to P and DH and I saw red. One of her friends is the mum of one of OH's closest friends so he knows now and she said she wouldn't tell anyone else (after DH gave her a rucking) but we told her the damage had been done.

It's really off. It's OUR news to tell when WE are ready. I'm not even 12 weeks yet and she knew full well that we didn't want to tell everyone until we got the all clear, especially as one of my dear friends went for her 12 weeks scan a few weeks back to be told she was a) having twins and b) that they had died.:-( :-( :cry:

Damn flipping woman. We now have to tell people so that they hear it from us and don't get upset that they heard it via the grapevine.

Just had to :angry: :angry: :angry: :hissyfit:

Lois xx

[~Twiggy~]

Shame on the woman. Honestly, fancy not respecting your wishes.

[Lois Lane]

She claims she didn't know Shirl - despite the fact I had emailed her (to which she DID reply) that I didn't want her telling anyone before 12 weeks - she had said she was going to phone all the family and tell them and I said no. Couldn't be plainer than that could I?????

[August Girl]

Ooh she needs a slap! How rude and arrogant of her. It should be your news.

[~Twiggy~]

Perhaps you should phone all the family and friends and tell them that your MIL has no respect and cannot keep her mouth shut. See how she likes to hear it through the grapevine at some point.

[Azana]

Cor blimey she really has surpassed herself this time hasn't she? Grrrrrrrrrrr on your behalf.

Az

I have to spend tomorrow at some HIDEOUS family event so no doubt will have some awful FIL stories to share after it to make you feel better, I can't QUITE think what he can do on that scale but he does normally do an excellent job of annoying the hell out of me. Luckily he is going through some strange agrophobic spell and won't leave the house or talk on the phone so we don't have to see him too often.


PPS sorry this now looks like it is about me - but hun, you KNOW I feel your pain. Yep it was your news and her stupidity is astounding.

[shamu]

OMG!
Do we have the same MIL???? Well, mine's not identical but she "shared" a celebratory bottle with the neighbours after we told her about James at 8 weeks. I'd specifically told DH to tell/ask her not to tell anyone and was furious with her :angry: It wasn't as if these were particularly good friends (DH asked their son to be his best man and his reply was "oh, I think Scotland is a bit far away" :huh: :hissyfit: )
My mum was similar too though :sigh: Had no idea why I was upset :rolleyes:
Shamu
:wink:

[Cherrypie]

Lois, my MIL did this too when we told her I was PG with Connor. I was barely 6 weeks att, and we'd been ttc for almost 18 months. We specifically asked her not to tell anyone - which she blatantly ignored and told all of our family north of the border. As you say, it was our news to share. But I was more concerned at getting past the 12 week mark or at least have the first scan before folk were told.

So I feel your pain and your anger. Grr. :sigh: :no: :twisted:

[Lois Lane]

We were the same with P - we asked both our parents not to tell ANYONE before 12 weeks and we thought they had respected that but she told me afterwards that she told her friends in America. I wasn't that annoyed with her as we didn't know these friends and they weren't likely to tell anyone over here but the people she has told this time are close family friends. If I were the friend that has found out through his Mum (MILs friend) then I'd be peed off that my DH hadn't said anything seeing as they are close.

Annoying thing for me is that this friend is married to someone I went to school with and it's not inconceivable that she will tell people who know my circle of friends. I just don't like being rushed into telling something I wanted to keep a secret just in case.

She must be feeling really guilty though - she's been to our house today, mowed our lawn, cleaned the kitchen, cooked us dinner and done some basic shopping for our return from holiday!! Should milk it whilst it lasts LOL!!!

[Chocolate Lips]

How very annoying. I would be livid too Lois.

[*kate*]

Bloody mothers. My mother did the same too - what IS it with them? I feel your annoyance and frustration too.

After a m/c I specifically asked her not to say to anyone I was pg. She was looking after the older 2 one day and when I came back to collect them, they said grandma had taken them out and met a friend and she'd said "ooh tell X your exciting news". Mother denied this but the kids were adamant she'd encouraged them - honestly, to use a 7 and 8 yr old in that way is just sly and dishonest - just one of the issues I have with my mother :rolleyes: :angry:

I think Madasatwig's suggestion is a good un.

[Anne]

Gosh Kate, thats bad! I hate it when adults use children to tell stuff they shouldnt.

Im there with all of you on this. My mum told everyone the first time before I had managed to drive home. This time she did it again. We didnt tell her about the m/c in between as she cant keep her mouth shut. So that way the kids didnt find out. I just cant trust her. She also discusses everything with my sister so nothing is private.
Sad really.

Anne

[Damsella]

Grr at your MIL! :angry:

This is why we didn't tell anyone - including my mother - until we were happy for everyone to know. You simply can't rely on people (including close family members, obviously :rolleyes: ) to keep their traps shut.

[Julesb]

What a selfish old moo!

[guinness]

oh my god how could you have been more clear than that!?
and dropping it in while you were on speakerphone talking to P - was she hoping you wouldnt tell her off or something? obviously knew she'd done wrong.... wow i am fuming on you behalf too, silly old bag.

[bisy backson]

sounds like they're all the same - my mother told my family when i'd specifically asked her not to, then when i confronted her about it she denied, so i asked her not to tell anyone else & she told the extended family - then lied about it to me when i confronted her again.

i couldn't decide whether i was more furious about her not respecting my wishes, or blatantly lying about it to me! :teehee:

you have my sympathise lois, but i guess at the end of the day they're just so excited they can't keep it to themselves which is a compliment i guess... (said through clenced teeth and not wholly convinced myself... :hissyfit: )

love to you and bump

bbxx

[DKNI]

My MIL did the same the first time round and I was soooooo annoyed as was DH. So this time round they only heard after we had the scan.

This was DH's decision as he said they lost their right to be privy to such a secret.

They weren't to happy as they had already booked their holiday and a weekend away :lol:

I can imagine you are well peed off and defintely think milking it will certainly help you feel better

[Blonde Girl]

OMG that is SO rude - as you say it was YOUR news...not hers..

She sounds a right old bag tbh!!

And as for your friend, that is awful news poor girl.

[Angie]

My step-MIL is a stupid, evil cow and did the exact same thing when I got pregnant with Liam.

I found it she'd told all her friends (who I don't even know) after one of her mad friends ran up to me in sainsburys when I was 11 weeks pregnant and grabbed my not-yet-existent bump. I hadn't ever met this woman but she guessed who I was as I was with my oh. I was really, really upset as most of my friends and none of my colleagues even knew about the baby yet.

Needless to say, next time round oh's parents can wait till after the scan before we tell them.

[Henrietta Figg]

I don't think you can trust anyone at all, I kept both our pregnancies to just the two of us until after 12 weeks, not a soul knew.

No-one knew we were even trying until we told them.:wink: So they were surprised to say the least. You must keep these mothers, MILs, friends and colleagues on their toes you know!!:teehee:

[Lois Lane]

HF - you're not wrong. I told my boss today (told the other two yesterday when he was out) and he didn't seem in the least bit surprised so I figure he's already been told by someone.:rolleyes:

I guess I'll just have to accept the fact that I'm not going to be able to keep my secret this time around.:happyno: