When do you realise that perhaps you arent friends anymore?

[Loukes]

Perhaps it seems like a strange question.

Been having a bad day today. Spent some time with some friends last night - I used to work with them all but left last year. I felt very out of it being with them - they all see each other all the time in and out of work.

Then a couple of texts this week from what was my best friend have really upset me and now I am left wondering what it is about me that I am losing my friends.............

[sapphire]

:higgies: maybe you've just outgrown them. I'm sure they're all your friends!! Re the work people thats always the same because usually that's all you've really got in common!!

I bet all your friends in RL think your fab just like your friends on Damsels do!

[*Fallen Angel*]

:higgies: maybe you've just outgrown them. I'm sure they're all your friends!! Re the work people thats always the same because usually that's all you've really got in common!!

I bet all your friends in RL think your fab just like your friends on Damsels do!

:agree: :hug:

[Loukes]

Thanks Sapphire

Perhaps they've outgrown me.......Feel like because I havent got a child then I'm not good enough for my best friend.

"I Hope you find what you want for yourself"

WTF is that supposed to mean in a text today????

Sorry just ranting and raving without thinking much cos I've not really got anyone to talk to......

[book_lover]

what were the texts hun? if we knew that we could perhaps see neutrally whether they are pointed or not...

xxx

[book_lover]

Hmmmm, not sure. All you can do is sit her down and ask - texting stuff like this is stupid - how are you supposed to know how you've upset her? If indeed you even have......

xxx

[Cat]

I've found with work friends, once you leave the company its relaly difficult to stay in touch and the relationships really change. I've been out with ex-colleagues and once you cant gossip about other work people and whats going on at the time, its hard to find things in common.
Have you talked to your best friend about what upset you in the texts? Obviously, I dont know what she said, but she may not have meant to upset you?

[Loukes]

I text her to see how she is getting on with her newborn and was all ok. mentioned we are hopefully booking our wedding tomorrow and that we were excited!!!!

She said nothing could compare to how they were and what I put above. Been feeling low cos I know it takes time when you have a baby but my requests for when I could pop in briefly to see her have been met with silence.

Just feeling crap

Probably am oversensitive.......dont relly get on wit new work colleagues, whenever I try to arrange to see friends they are too busy and I've felt for a while that my mate has changed towards me.

[book_lover]

what - she said you were trying to compete with her happiness with your marriage plans? I don't understand the context of this......

xxx

[Loukes]

Thats what it felt like..............Why else would you put that?

I feel like that she responds cos she feels she has to but tries to put me off contacting her iyswim.......

My OH does wonder why I am friends with her sometimes cos of a few things she has said in the past.

Dont know if you know my situation with OH's ex - but when I was going through my roughest time she told me i was boring cos all I ever talked about was how I was being threatened etc.

[sapphire]

She sounds a real charmer Loukes. In fact I recognise it because my "best friend" and my cousin can sometimes be the same...it's called self obsessed! They don't tend to like other people getting any attention.

I'm sure your not boring at all x

[Loukes]

Thanks guys.

Going out now - with OH - dont really want to go but he's making me! :smile:

Hopefully I'll feel better in morning - maybe just wait to see if she ever contacts me..........

[book_lover]

Oh God Loukes, she sounds like really hard work, and not the most supportive friend ever! Of course, she'll be hormonal now, and that won't help but ffs. I hope you get it sorted out - that is, if you want to.

Or is it her version of a cry for help? Could she be showing signs of post natal depression?

xxx

[sapphire]

Thanks guys.

Going out now - with OH - dont really want to go but he's making me! :smile:

Hopefully I'll feel better in morning - maybe just wait to see if she ever contacts me..........

Have a good time and forget about her if she brings you down, some people have the habit of doing that!!

[Loukes]

To my friend who I now know uses Damsels.

I have replied to your email. Sorry I couldnt be honest with you about the way I was feeling and it seems you have misread texts from me just like me from you.

Dont know what to say. Suppose we have both finally been honest with each other now.

I understand if I have upset you and that if you feel we cant be friends. Its how I think you have prob felt for a while but again maybe I am wrong.

You do mean a hell of alot to me which is why this upsets me so much. Always will. Not just saying that for the benfit of here. I mean it. You know I do.

Anyway - Hope your DD has gven you some rest.

All i can do is apologise for upsetting you.

[book_lover]

:shock: I hope you two manage to sort it out :hugs:

xxxx