FFS Give Me A Break!

[Calamity]

My mum has just phoned full of doom and gloom.

She phoned me at work to inform me that Lorna has been up crying all night. She had 2 spoons of porridge this morning and eaten nothing else since. She's had a temperature of 39.8 for the last couple of hours and she's in her nappy with the windows open.

She's been sleeping all day long and whimpering like a ummm............ baby :roll: I asked if her ears were red and was told yes both ears have been red on and off today (which I guess they would be anyway if she was hot and teething).

She won't drink anything so my mum can't get any calpol or calgel anywhere near her mouth. So now I'm going to have to cut short my meeting up with my friend after work to head off to my mum's to check on Lorna.

Why does this always seem to happen when I'm already at breaking point and need a break away from her :huh: OH and I had planned to go out for a meal after I'd had a couple of drinks with my friend. Now I'm destined for a busy evening trying to persuade my mum that Lorna doesn't need to go to hospital and she is just teething and there's no need for me to get fired tomorrow for taking more time off work :doh: :doh:

I know I sound like such a cow when my LO is obviously under the weather with teething but sometimes I wish my mum would just stop overreacting and chill out a bit. I've already told my OH that we'll have to go and check on Lorna and he's not very happy about my mum phoning me.

I did however hear Lorna moaning and saying over and over again "mummy, mummy, mummy" which yeah, really tugged on the heartstrings and I just want to cry :-(

Sorry for the second self indulgent post of the day

[shamu]

Oh hun
:hugs:
:hugs:
:hugs:
:flowers:
:choc:
I've no idea how our children know when we're at breaking point but they do :-(
I have to say (and plesae don't shout ;-) ) that a temp of nearly 40 is unlikely to be only teething - sorry :-( She may have an ear infection or throat infection on top, hence the crying and whimpering etc..... Is there any way you could ring the local GP before you leave work and get her checked over quickly - that way you can reassure your mum that she's been seen and sorted out. If I lived nearer I'd check her over for you (and look after her tonight so you can still go out....)
Let us know how things go
Love, hugs and positive vibes
Shamu
;-)

[dora the ex...]

aww im sorry but you are not a cow by any means you diserve a great night out and relax for a change im sure your mum will be ok for just this once i know that seems awfull but still i would go out she will be ok xx i would go check her and give her some calpol and fingers crossed she will be fine...teething is such a downer i hope ur ok hun xxhugs to you :wik:


ETA; shamus advice is so much better...

[shamu]

aww im sorry but you are not a cow by any means you diserve a great night out and relax for a change im sure your mum will be ok for just this once i know that seems awfull but still i would go out she will be ok xx i would go check her and give her some calpol and fingers crossed she will be fine...teething is such a downer i hope ur ok hun xxhugs to you :wik:


ETA; shamus advice is so much better...

Daft thing - I can't diagnose telepathically you know ;-) And I have been known to be wrong ;-) And she still needs the calpol and hugs :D and I was hoping that Jane's mum would feel reassured knowing L had been checked and would look after L tonight for her :)
Shamu
;-)

[Calamity]

My GP is closed now so I'd have to ring the NHS24 thing and they would probably tell me to just keep an eye on her and do what I suggested to my mum i.e. stripping her off, cool flannel, plenty to drink.

I know the last time this happened (Valentine's Day when OH were going for a meal again :roll: ) I ended up taking her to the out of hours community GP thing in the hospital and they said she had an ear infection and gave me anti-biotics for her.

I'm wondering if I can leave her tonight and call the GP in the morning and get them to give me a prescription over the phone as they have done on numerous occassions already :roll:

I'll go along tonight and check on her and if I'm satisfied she's ok and just teething then I'll probably just go home via the chinese take-away instead of going for a meal.

Oh why does it have to be so :pants:

[shamu]

Jane does your mum know how cr@p you've been feeling the last couple of days? If so, could she take her to be checked over (the out of hours GP service would be a good start)? No reason that a grandparent can't take their grandaughter. It might reassure your mum and then you won't have hours of "ooh shouldn't we take her to the hospital" etc etc etc.
You're probably going to have to be quite firm with L and syringe/spoon the paracetamol and ibuprofen down her if she isn't keen on drinking. Sometimes takes two people - one to pin the child down and one to get the stuff in their mouths :roll: THat's how I do it with James when he's playing up :-)
I think you need your space tonight and I'd leave her at your mum's whatever happens beforehand. That's what I'd do sweet.
Crossing my fingers that she's a bit perkier when you see her
Shamu
;-)

[noo noo]

Probably get flamed for this but you're blood lucky having your mum to take Lorna during the day and overnight every single week - I'd love someone to take my two off my hands and get a break. Get your priorities straight - a drink with a friend is not more important than YOUR baby with a temp of 40. And why the hell is your DH unhappy about your mum phoning you to say that your daughter is clearly ill? Sorry if it upsets you but that just the way I see it.

[RedTiger]

It never rains but it pours as my wee granny used to say! Sorry Lorna's poorly Jane, especially when you were meant to be going out (though rather selfishly i'm glad its not next week :shock: :oops: ) Would your Mum have her another night to let you & your OH go out if you don't make it out tonight?

:hugs: Hope she's better by the time you get to her and you can still enjoy your evening.

[Cherrypie]

Jane, sorry your plans have gone awry when you need a break. But a temp of nearly 40 really shouldn't be left unchecked. If my mum was looking after Eilis or Connor and they were poorly, I would expect her to call and confer with me. I imagine your mum presumes you'd want to know, and to be with Lorna if she's ill. It's probably not a case of her not being able to cope.

Good advice from Shamu as always.

And I'm not flaming NooNoo - though she's maybe been rather blunter than I would have been. But in the same situation I'd want to postpone my evening out and be with my poorly LO.

Hope she's better soon. And I hope your week picks up too. xxx

[tekkencat]

kids are psychic they just know when you have stuff planned - but to be fair thats what makes um kids and us parents - rearrange your plans - and take lots of deap breaths

TC
xx

[Nics]

I was just going to say I would be furious if my mum DIDNT tell me if one of my kids had a temp that high.

N x

[Calamity]

Hiya, that's us just back in from my mum's.

No flaming for anyone, I'm too tired.

My mum did overreact, Lorna was giggling when I went in and when we took her temperature it was 36.4

I put her in the bath and she played with her frogs then had some milk. I gave her a cuddle and she fell asleep in my arms. I checked her ears as best I could and they both looked normal.

Going to eat our take-a-way now and go to sleep.

J.x

ETA: The fire was also on full blast when I went in and I immediately had to take my cardigan off. My mum was trying to use a thermometer under Lorna's armpit earlier and she wouldn't sit properly so I'm not surprised the reading was wrong.

I'm going up to Boots tomorrow to buy her another dummy thermometer (she's already lost one) so she can get a proper reading as Lorna will sit and suck the dummy one no problem but doesn't take kindly to things being put anywhere near her ears.

[Jamtart]

I'm glad Lorna is ok Jane!

I really hope tomorrow is a better day for you

[*Fallen Angel*]

Hope she feels better in the morning Jane.

ETA well done on your great weight loss :ellie:

[RedTiger]

Glad she's still managing to giggle and seems a bit brighter now :)

Enjoy your take away.

[Calamity]

Enjoy your take away.

I'm afraid I was too pissed off with this thread to enjoy it Red, night honey x

[dora the ex...]

i hope tomorrow is a better day for you hun x

[Princess Fiona]

Sorry i'm late to this thread.

Glad to hear Lorna is ok hon!

[katkinn]

fwiw I'm sure that Jane never meant things the way that it appeared they came across.

I know i'm probably putting words in your mouth hon, but I do know that Lorna is your entire world and there is no way that you would do anything at all to jeopardise her health, happiness or wellbeing.

As far as I can see (and again, forgive me hon if I'm talking out of turn), Jane is having a really really shitty time at the moment and was just venting rather than actually MEANING that it was a total inconvenience and she didn't come across, like some of you may have thought.

But for what it's worth anyway, in my opinion, there ARE days (and thank heavens they are only once in a bluemoon usually) that no matter how much we adore our children and they are the centre of our world, if we're having a really crappy time of it and they're not well, as much as we feel sorry for them and are concerned about them, would change places with them, etc etc a teensy tiny part of us is only human to find it a tad annoying.......

Well that's what I think anyway, I do think that her venting was taken out of context and I absolutely know that she would do anything in the world for Lorna, no matter where or when.

katkinn
xxxx

(Jane hon, please excuse me if I'm talking a load of old balls :oops: :oops: :oops: )

[spritzer]

Absolutely ditto what Katkinn said.

I hope Lorna is feeling better today and that you had a reasonable night's rest and feel a bit brighter this morning.

FWIW - if I expressed half the things that go through my mind when I'm stressed you'd all be on to social services quicker blinking.

[Calamity]

Thanks Kat, I appreciate that.

I don't feel that I really have to justify myself but here goes......

My mum has a tendancy to phone me for the slightest thing and has done this on numerous ocassions. 99% of the time Lorna is fine and just grizzling but the last time my mum phoned me there geniunely was something wrong with her.

Therefore I didn't want to just ignore the phone call from my mum and I went up there after work. Lorna was indeed fine and I put her in the bath, got her into her pj's, gave her a bottle and cuddled her until she went to sleep.

All the while I was absolutely knackered and feeling really unwell but I didn't care. I know what my priorities are thank you very much. I was annoyed because there was a 99% chance there was nothing wrong with Lorna. With one thing and another that's going on in my personal life just now I'd felt like I was going to have a breakdown on Sunday and came very close to hitting Lorna. I needed a break away from her for my own sanity and for her too as it couldn't be very nice for her having me shouting in her face and watching me slumped in a corner crying my eyes out wishing my life would end, when she was teething and feeling upset already.

So there, was I just thinking of myself? And on the subject of my mum looking after Lorna 2 days every week, she does so because we can't afford to put Lorna into nursery full time. She stays over on a Sunday night because I work different shifts and I would have to get her up at 5.30am to get a train to my mum's in the morning. This is less disruptive for EVERYONE and it was my father that actually suggested we bring her on a Sunday.

You may or may not realise that we are all living on top of each other just now. Lorna is in a cot that is right up against our bed as we are still in a one bedroom flat and are struggling to afford to move out. It's really not easy having no privacy and having to share your bedroom with a toddler for almost a year and a half. If she was in her own room she'd probably wake up in the morning then doze back off again but because she knows we're there there's no dozing back off, she want to play. I'm a light sleeper too so when she wakes up, I wake up and lately that's been around 6am every morning for the last couple of months.

I'm lacking sleep, privacy, any sort of sexual relationship with my OH which is crumbling, I'm forced to stay in a job I hate because we need the money, we can't afford to move to a bigger house, I'm suffering from very bad PMT and possibly PND if I'm honest, it kills me that my daughter is at nursery 3 days every week and not at home with me and Lorna going to my parents house is the only thing that's keeping me sane right now.

There, I've said my peace and hopefully that'll be the end to it. Maybe next time if anyone feels the need to publicly humilate anyone they might think of doing it via a PM.

Jane

ETA: I phoned my mum this morning to check on how Lorna was and she was playing with Bella and Fizz in her tent, had eaten toast and a banana for breakfast and was back to her old self.

[spritzer]

There's always a comfy bed in our spare room whenever you need :D I realise we are a bit far from you but the offer's there anyway.

P.S. we must have been posting at the same time as I replied after Kat.

[katkinn]

:grouphug:


if I expressed half the things that go through my mind when I'm stressed you'd all be on to social services quicker blinking.

absolutely agree - there for the grace of god go I :oops:

Jane I hope you're feeling a bit better today hon. If there is anything at all we can do, please please let us know. I really really wish that I lived nearer so I could take Lorna off your hands for a bit and her and her twin could get to know each other whilst you had a break.
Thinking of you honey.
katkinn
xxxxx

[bluekat]

Hey Jane :wave: :wave: :wave:

Lots of love from BK & Lexie xxx

PS you don't have to justify yourself & hope everythings better for you very soon.

[tekkencat]

i've pm'd you

TC
xx

[Starlight]

Really late to this thread (been up to my ears in sick and poo all weekend but thats another story) but really glad that Lorna is feeling better.

Really sorry you're feeling down Jane. With all that's going on its no wonder you are stressed. I really hope you start to feel better soon.

[Mad Madam Mim]

Jane :hugs: I know you're having a hard time. I'm about to email you. xx