Feel sad now- week off over. RE: Pre-school!

[ms sweetcheeks]

Ok I know this is going to sound really :loco:

But I have had the week off and have taken DS to and from school nursery everyday and I have enjoyed it SO much.
So much so that I am DREADING going back to work on Monday:cry:

DS has 2 really good friend there and in this week I developed friendships (how quick?!) with their mums, and I will really miss our little chats twice a day.

One of the mums was even hugging me and they're both just lovely, and have invited us to things, but I can't commit due to FLIPPIN work:cry::hissyfit::-(

I cannot wait for my maternity leave, but feel sad that I wont see any of the lovely little kids or their mums until then, as I have no more holiday this year:-(
Theo has LOVED having me there everyday and he will be upset when I will ahve to go to work again next week:cry:

Today I am UBER envious of SAHMs- sorry:-(

[spandangley]

:hug:

[smiley]

:higgies:

I know - being a working mum sucks sometimes :sigh:


I also find it hard going back to work after a week off - and the boys hate it for a few days.

But it isnt long til Christmas, and then March will be here before you know it..........

:higgies: to you though .... going back to work after a brak is horrid,


s xxx

[goldilocks]

:hug:

[Shoppie]

:higgies:

I know - being a working mum sucks sometimes :sigh:


I also find it hard going back to work after a week off - and the boys hate it for a few days.

But it isnt long til Christmas, and then March will be here before you know it..........

:higgies: to you though .... going back to work after a brak is horrid,


s xxx

Precisely WSS! :nod: Are you able to wangle leaving early once a week in return for extending your hours on the other days?

I am really dreading T stating school and not being able to pck him up/ drop him off :-(

[ms sweetcheeks]

Precisely WSS! :nod: Are you able to wangle leaving early once a week in return for extending your hours on the other days?


:happyno:I work 9am-5.30 and get home 6.30pm so there's no way I could extend any of those hours..?
I leave the house at 8am everyday as well, so couldn't start earlier:happyno:


:-(

I can only thank my stars that I will be there when DS stars school, thankfully:bow:

[calfee]

I hate being a working mum too :no: I worked only 2.5 days when the older two were small but I had to change that back to full time but I stood my ground against DH's wishes and now work 4 days with Fridays off. I actually posted a pic on Facebook a few days ago showing my 3 walking up to school on a Fri morning and I said how much I look forwards to doing it every week :nod:

I loved my mat leave 'cos I could be a SAHM for a while too - I had to be dragged back to work.

:higgies: hang on in there until your mat leave starts! :smile:

[ms sweetcheeks]

I am not planning on returning to work after this baby:happyno:
For some reason I 100% think it's harder working now, than it was when DS couldn't tell me how he felt about it!

[calfee]

I am not planning on returning to work after this baby:happyno:


:bow: That's exactly what I wanted to do :nod: Unfortunately building a huge extension to double the size of the house scuppered that notion!

[Shoppie]

Could DH do a pick up/ drop off though? So for example when I was working FT before going off to have Bobby, i worked in Peterborough a lot leaving 5 am and getting home about 9 pm - but in exchange I finished early the other 4 days and picked Teddy up. it meant I didn't see him at all one day but it was defo worth it :nod:

Working with a chid who has an opinion they can express eg that they miss you is definitely much harder. I have had a lot of ' mummy no work', 'me no like nursery' etc since returning:sigh:

[ms sweetcheeks]

Could DH do a pick up/ drop off though?

Nah:no:
He leaves at 7.30 am and comes home at 7.30pm.

And tbh every other week he is abroad, like this week he's been in germany all week.

So he is no use whatsoever:happyno:

[ms sweetcheeks]

:bow: That's exactly what I wanted to do :nod: Unfortunately building a huge extension to double the size of the house scuppered that notion!
Yeah I see the dilemma.. We'd LOVE a loft extension, but if we did that, I would have to earn some dollars:nod:

[calfee]

Yeah I see the dilemma.. We'd LOVE a loft extension, but if we did that, I would have to earn some dollars:nod:

Oh I :lurve: my house now, I keep meaning to take some pics to post but never remember when the house is clean enough! We went from a wee 3 bed 1 loo bungalow to 4 bed 3 loo huge kitchen/diner and I wish we'd done it years ago. I try to tell myself that I have the best of both worlds but I'd still rather not work :happyno:

[ChelseaHarvey]

:higgies:

[Peridot]

I can only thank my stars that I will be there when DS stars school, thankfully:bow:

I think this is what you have to keep in your head :nod:
its not stress free being a SAHM but I guess its a lot more guilt -free .... although Thomas still screams at me.... no mummy, no nursery, nursery shut, stay at home with mummy!
not long to go and you'll be done :hug:

[katkinn]

oh darling :higgies:

I will say though that it's a bed of roses being a SAHM by ANY stretch of the imagination. I do think it's very much a case of the grass is always greener :meh:

That sounds really trite after what you've written though :oops: and of course you're gutted after having had a week off and having to go back to work :higgies:

But just to say it's often seriously not it's all cracked up to be!!

eta - Crossed posts with Peri! Yes, there is the lack of guilt that's v true. But doesn't make you personally feel any better some days :doh:

[Cherrypie]

:higgies:

I know - being a working mum sucks sometimes :sigh:


I also find it hard going back to work after a week off - and the boys hate it for a few days.

But it isnt long til Christmas, and then March will be here before you know it..........

:higgies: to you though .... going back to work after a break is horrid,




Agree with what Smiley says.

The kids here had holidays a couple of weeks ago, and I had a week off with the kids. We had such a lovely time, caught up with friends, went on day visits etc. I love my job, but I really didn't want to go back to work :happyno: on the Monday.
I have two weeks off at Christmas and I can't wait!

:higgies:to you. xx

[Peridot]

oh darling :higgies:

I will say though that it's a bed of roses being a SAHM by ANY stretch of the imagination. I do think it's very much a case of the grass is always greener :meh:

That sounds really trite after what you've written though :oops: and of course you're gutted after having had a week off and having to go back to work :higgies:

But just to say it's often seriously not it's all cracked up to be!!

eta - Crossed posts with Peri! Yes, there is the lack of guilt that's v true. But doesn't make you personally feel any better some days :doh:

I think Kat meant to say it NOT all a bed of roses and I have to agree especially with the fact that the grass does seem greener on the other side... I know some people whilst on mat leave find being a SAHM easier but I think that's becoz they're aware of being on mat leave.
There are still feelings of guilt but I guess just not so much to do with the children and more to do with the fact that you're not financially participating to the house-hold. I am happy though that I am a SAHM as that is what I have chosen and I think that's prob what's most important.... and you don't have long now... after Christmas it will fly by :nod:

[Lovebug]

:higgies:

[katkinn]

I think Kat meant to say it NOT all a bed of roses and I have to agree especially with the fact that the grass does seem greener on the other side... I know some people whilst on mat leave find being a SAHM easier but I think that's becoz they're aware of being on mat leave.
There are still feelings of guilt but I guess just not so much to do with the children and more to do with the fact that you're not financially participating to the house-hold. I am happy though that I am a SAHM as that is what I have chosen and I think that's prob what's most important.... and you don't have long now... after Christmas it will fly by :nod:

:doh: oh my fecking word that's what I miss most - my brain :cry: :cry: :cry:
Yes, it's not a bed of roses is what I meant :lol:

I'm amazed actually at how much more difficult - not necessarily physically, but certainly mentally, I find not working and being a SAHM than when I worked part time and even when I freelanced.

And Peri, you're absolutely right - there are a whole host of hideous guilt feelings - just different ones :doh: (and mine are more selfish so I don't talk about them :oops:)

Sorry for the slight hijack though Mrs SC :oops: It's great to hear you had such a great week and it won't be long before you're on mat leave :grin:

[Velvet Chain]

I count myself really lucky that I am able to work around taking and picking up DS from school....as I would really really miss it. I am friends with the other parents and we got on really well and often they meet me around my classes for a coffee and a chat and then our children play after school together.

As much as I moan at the stupid hour that we have to get up because of DS starting school so early (have to be through the gates before 7.30am) I wouldn't change it.

VC

[Sparkly]

:higgies: I also struggle with being a WAHM - feel like I'm always neglecting etiher the children or work, and def me! :wink: I'm not sure there is any perfect solution but :flowers: for how you're feeling today and :woohoo: that you can stop work when bubba no.2 arrives!

[ms sweetcheeks]

Kat and Peridot, I am under no illusion that it will be easy, fun or stimulating or anything as such..

But what will ease LOTS is my massive guilt that weighs me down every day of my working life.

Of course I will go :loco: some (most) days, but I really feel like the time has come (for me) to be a FT mummy to my gorgeous boy- even though I will probably be SHIT and grumpy and MISS wearing work clothes, and miss my lunchbreaks etc- but ATEOTD, those are all my own selfish needs iyswim.

I can get over that, as I can see his happy face , and not this sort of face :cry: when I walk down the road every morning- looking at me through the bedroom window.. :no:

It literally hurts my heart physically!!

All DS could talk about the weekend leading up to Monday, was how I could meet L and J's mummies and he was, for some reason he was so HAPPY about that, and I think it's because he sees all the mums standing around talking and he's the only one with no mum there usually:cry:

[Oana]

:higgies: Ah your post made me well up :cry:When I had DD (now 13) I had no choice but to work full time and I felt so, so awful. Like you I didn't know any other parents and just felt so out of it when all I really wanted was to feel a part of the 'mum brigade'. I had to work full time until she was 8 so never got to pick her up from school & help out on trips etc

DS on the other hand is now 3.5 and I went back part time and it is wonderful, best of both worlds for me. I realise how incredibly lucky I am :nod:

[Blonde Girl]

Oh S :higgies: I can remember when I worked and had to drop Dan off at nursery 3 days a week, I was :cry: some of the days as I just didn't want to leave him :no:

Like someone said (sorry can't remember who :oops:) It will soon be Christmas and then you will totally be on the countdown to March and mat leave :nod:

And, ok this might be a tad unethical :oops: , but if you aren't going back anyway, could you not have a day or two off 'sick' in the next few months, then you could at least take T in then and have that to break the time up a bit.

[ms sweetcheeks]

ok this might be a tad unethical :oops: , but if you aren't going back anyway, could you not have a day or two off 'sick' in the next few months, then you could at least take T in then and have that to break the time up a bit.

:grin::nod::thumb:

[Micah]

Know how you feel :nod:

I am desperate to be a SAHM. I could so live without the stress of having to work, keep the house tidy, keep everyone fed, clothed etc.

I love it when I have a day off work and can drop DD1 off, go to a dance class with DD2, get the house tidied, dinner on while she naps, then be at the school gates for 3.30 :nod:.

[ms sweetcheeks]

Know how you feel :nod:

I am desperate to be a SAHM. .

:hug: Have you got any plans to be, or will you continue working?
You're Part Time now though, right?

[lazybones]

I agree with blonde girl! :thumb:

I would love to be at least part time. :sigh:

[smiley]

I'm amazed actually at how much more difficult - not necessarily physically, but certainly mentally, I find not working and being a SAHM than when I worked part time and even when I freelanced.

And Peri, you're absolutely right - there are a whole host of hideous guilt feelings - just different ones :doh: (and mine are more selfish so I don't talk about them :oops:)



I find working SO hard, and I love being a SAHM when I can (took 8 weeks of parental leave in the summer which was amazing :grin: ) but then i always know the end is in sight...... I would find giving up the financial gain, the independance and life outside the kids very hard. :oops:


But I do hate that I am constantly chasing my tail, feeling that the kids AND work never get 100% from me, and constant worry that I have forgotten something really important (and having a client on the phone 5 mins after I was supposed to have left the office to collect the boys :hissyfit: )


I can get over that, as I can see his happy face , and not this sort of face :cry: when I walk down the road every morning- looking at me through the bedroom window.. :no:

It literally hurts my heart physically!!

All DS could talk about the weekend leading up to Monday, was how I could meet L and J's mummies and he was, for some reason he was so HAPPY about that, and I think it's because he sees all the mums standing around talking and he's the only one with no mum there usually:cry:


You may remember i had the same with J earlier this year. It is SO much harder to leave your kids to work as they get older. Now, J wants me to help him with his homework etc.


I have found working PT the best option. I am SO lucky I can manage it. I earn much less but save on childcare costs and put the boys in day camp in the holidays.

i know lots of people cant do that and I am very lucky though :nod:



Know how you feel :nod:

I am desperate to be a SAHM. I could so live without the stress of having to work, keep the house tidy, keep everyone fed, clothed etc.

I love it when I have a day off work and can drop DD1 off, go to a dance class with DD2, get the house tidied, dinner on while she naps, then be at the school gates for 3.30 :nod:.


Oh yes, I love being able to do housework in daylight hours! And watch Loose Women :teehee:



s xxx

[DannyGirl]

Aww I know how hard it is to leave them :hug: Hopefully the next few months will fly by :nod:

[Peridot]

But I do hate that I am constantly chasing my tail, feeling that the kids AND work never get 100% from me, and constant worry that I have forgotten something really important

Do you work part time Smiley?
this is totally how I used to feel - sometimes it was totally the best of both worlds but other times the worst of both worlds.
I used to think some people didn't take me seriously working part time :hissyfit: which drove me mad because I took my work very seriously :wink:

definately agree with taking a few sickies :nod::thumb:

[smiley]

Do you work part time Smiley?
this is totally how I used to feel - sometimes it was totally the best of both worlds but other times the worst of both worlds.
I used to think some people didn't take me seriously working part time :hissyfit: which drove me mad because I took my work very seriously :wink:



:nod: I do work PT - 5 days a week, 30 hours, 8.30 to 2.30 with no lunch, so it is great as I have every afternoon with the boys, but by the time I race like a loon to collect them I am often v stressed and brain still in work mode. I do have to take work calls/emails until 5.30 too, which is fine by me as i can do it in the park :thumb:


Its not great, but a hell of a lot better than working FT ..... I am totally :bow: to those of you who do that.


But yes, you do not get taken seriously at all. I am doing the same job so in effect my 40hr week for 75% pay :huh: as noone has taken work off me. I often work in the evening to finish something.

But as I said, much much preferable to working FT when I used to do 9.30 - 6.30 and the boys were often in bed when I got home.


Sorry for hijack MrsS ..... I think being a working mummy is tough in different ways to a SAHM. A SAHM doesnt get the respect she deserves either, but doesnt feel she is constantly letting her kids down. A working mum is forever torn between work and kids and no one ever thanks you for it (well, maybe the taxman who takes a huge chunk of your salary :rolleyes: )


s xxx